What if your life sucked?

We all hear people say their life sucks, or stinks or something like that, but what if it was true? We’ll get back to that in a minute.

If you know me, you might not call me an introvert, but if you know me well, you probably would.

My goal when I travel by airplane is to not sit next to anyone, but if I do have to, to absolutely not speak with them. I consider it to have been a successful flight when I arrive at my destination and I haven’t said a single word to the person(s) seated near me. Yeah, I know, it’s not a laudable goal, but it’s what I do.

Strange in a way, since I really do like people, actually, I love people. But, I don’t feel like engaging in conversation with a complete stranger that I will probably never see again. I prefer to speak to people that I will interact with regularly. In fact, the sad truth is that I have no friends or relationships with people that I don’t have some reason to. I don’t converse with a single friend from high school, college, prior jobs or from any activities that I might have met them. Not something that I am proud of, but I just don’t nourish those relationships.

So, you can imagine my dismay when I sat next to chatty Cathy on a flight from Philadelphia to Fort Lauderdale Florida recently. It all went wrong when I had to excuse myself as I tried to plop my over-sized derriere into the middle seat. You know that’s the worst seat, your chances of vocal contact just increased by fifty percent with a possible attack from both sides. As it turned out, the odds had just tipped against me.

She opened with a line that I couldn’t ignore as she stated “My life Sucks”. I have to admit that I was struggling for ways to pretend I didn’t hear it, ‘cause I knew that was a verbal volley that required a return. While I instantly calculated the odds of her believing I had suffered severe hearing loss at some point earlier in my life, I realized it was over. I was never good at acting, and thus would never be able to play a deaf character believably for two and half hours.

So, I was faced with a decision. Do I tell her that I don’t care how bad her life sucks? I could say something like, “That’s nice, mine is great, glad I am not you”, but apparently Jesus had made the trip with me. He shut that down pretty quick. I realized that I couldn’t pretend to be a Christian on Sunday, and then completely shut down one of God’s children on Monday. Nope, that wasn’t the right thing and truthfully, I really do care about people, so I couldn’t do that anyway despite my deep seeded need to rest my vocals.

So, I offered the only response that I felt was acceptable as I volleyed back “Really, Why is that?” I prepared myself for the onslaught, half expecting to hear complaints about material things or unimportant details that we so often consume ourselves with. She started to weave her tale.

It started about 18 years ago, I was instantly gratified that this wasn’t a transcontinental or transatlantic flight. She was diagnosed with breast cancer. She fought it for a few years, and won the battle. During her struggle, her husband left her, which ruined her financially as he didn’t ever pay her a single cent of child support.

After she beat the cancer, she lost her job. A few years later she was headed for a vacation with her daughter; a cruise to take them away from the pain and struggles of the years, even if only for a little while. On the way to the airport, they were involved in a car accident, which took her only daughters life. The car accident also left her unable to walk for three years. As she was recovering from that, she was diagnosed with cancer again, this time in the uterus. She went into treatment for a few years and beat that. By now, I was totally blown away, but she had more.

After beating that cancer, she settled into a normal life for a few years, and then started to feel something was wrong. The doctors couldn’t find anything wrong. This went on for a year or so until a huge mass was discovered in her uterus again. This time they said there was nothing they could do because the cancer had become entwined in too many organs. She could try to be treated with chemotherapy, but the odds of success we not in her favor. She tried, but has not responded to treatment. The doctors have given her less than a year to live.

She decided to give it all up, to say the heck with it and spend the rest of her time on earth enjoying what she could. She was on her way to take a 30 day cruise, then when she gets done with that, a visit to the doctor to see what he says. Depending on what he says, she is planning a 100 day cruise, on which she wants to die.

I was just about in tears. What an awful story. Here I was sitting right next to this poor soul, wishing I could find a way to not even say hello. I might be one of her last ‘real’ encounters on earth and I was about to waste it on my selfish desires for peace and quiet.

My question too all you is, what if your life sucked? I mean, what if it REALLY sucked? What would you do? What would you expect from others?

I am truly blessed in so many ways, but what do I do for others that aren’t? Play deaf? Pretend I can’t hear them, speak another language, and walk by them without so much as a look or a nod of affirmation? Not even say hello, give a sense of hope, of love, of care, concern or empathy? Is that what I do?

O dear lord, please help me not to be that way to your children. Please lord, make me always realize that every living, breathing person is deserving of your mercy, of my human love. Make me new in my ways; help me to show that I am Christian through my actions, words and deeds.